


What Coin So Precious

by fhsa_archivist



Category: The X-Files
Genre: Angst, Filk
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2004-06-25
Updated: 2004-06-25
Packaged: 2019-02-05 16:08:11
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 2
Words: 20,102
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12797895
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/fhsa_archivist/pseuds/fhsa_archivist
Summary: Boy meets boy. Boy falls in love with boy. Boy loses boy.





	1. What Coin So Precious

**Author's Note:**

> Note from Haven, the archivist: This story was originally archived at [Fandom Haven Story Archive (FHSA)](http://fanlore.org/wiki/Fandom_Haven_Story_Archive), was scheduled to shut down at the end of 2016. To preserve the archive, I began working with the OTW to transfer the stories to the AO3 as an Open Doors-approved project in November 2017. If you are this creator and the work hasn't transferred to your AO3 account, please contact me using the e-mail address on [Fandom Haven Story Archive collection profile](http://archiveofourown.org/collections/fhsa/profile).

I was standing in the spot I normally occupied on Friday and Saturday nights when the car pulled up. 

 

I had worked hard to get a scholarship but had found it hard going even with that. I had tried part time jobs but the hours they wanted interfered with my studies too much. So, I found myself tricking two nights a week. It paid better and left me with all the study time I needed.

 

The window rolled down, I strutted over to lean down and look in the window and tried to see the driver's face. I couldn't see him very well because of the shadows but then I wasn't there looking for a relationship. 

 

"Are you a police officer?"

 

"What?"

 

"Because if you are and you don't tell me after I've asked, then anything else that happens is entrapment."

 

"No, I'm not looking to arrest you. How much?"

 

"Depends on what you want. Head will cost you fifty. Straight fuck is a hundred. Anything else we negotiate."

 

"Are you that good?"

 

"I've never been asked for a refund."

 

"Is that giving or receiving prices?" 

 

I grinned. He had a great voice and I wanted to hear what he sounded like when he came.

 

"Well, I normally *give* head and *receive* the fucking. But, then again, you are the client so it's up to you. The price is the same either way." 

 

"Get in."

 

I straightened and opened the door sliding into the car next to him. 

 

"There's an alley about three blocks down."

 

"No, I don't do alleys. We'll get a room."

 

"Your time, your call."

 

This part of town wasn't well lit so I couldn't get much of a look at him. Not that I cared. He was springing for a room so that meant he was no slouch. He drove farther than I expected, the place he picked was cleaner. He went in to get the room and I waited. He didn't speak as he drove to the back of the motel. Nor while I followed him into the room.

 

Once inside, I got my first good look at him. Definitely not a slouch. He started to undress; I dropped my jacket in the chair and reached for the hem of my tee shirt. 

 

"No, I'll do that."

 

"Sure. I usually get the money thing out of the way."

 

"Of course."

 

He opened his wallet, pulled out a couple of bills and held them out to me. I took them and looked down expecting to see two fifties. It was a hundred and a fifty. So he thought he was up for both. Well, I was in no hurry, it was still early. I watched as he finished undressing with his back to me. When he turned I thought // God! I should have charged this guy by the pound. That's gonna hurt//.

 

He walked toward me, smiling. Great smile. // Why is this guy out buying company? Hell, he could go to any gay bar in town and get laid, especially with some of those size junkies//. 

 

After he became a regular I asked him that one night. "I'm married", he told me. "This way I don't have to worry about some guy showing up at my house wanting to talk with my wife."

 

He bent toward me and I pulled back reflexively. 

 

"What?"

 

"I don't kiss."

 

He actually chuckled. Then turned and walked back to his clothes, opening his wallet and pulling out another bill. He held up the fifty and raised an eyebrow. Two hundred and I could make it an early night tonight. I reached for it and tucked it away with the rest. 

 

He smiled then his hands were in my hair and his mouth on mine. How can I explain what happened with that? Words don't do it justice. I could say a tidal wave washed over me. Use an old cliché: the earth moved. Steal from romance novels and say I was swept up in his manly arms to be kissed breathless. 

 

Truth is, he stole my soul that night, and he still has it. 

 

When he pulled back, I saw surprise on his face. He covered it quickly by pulling my shirt up over my head. His head dipped and his mouth fastened on my throat. I should have charged him extra for that hickey, the fucking thing lasted for a week. 

 

I almost went into shock when he dropped to his knees and opened my fly, taking me in his mouth. I watched as he brought me erect. Johns didn't blow me: I blew them. God, it felt so good. 

 

I moaned and he looked up at me, pulling back, "Like that?"

 

"Yeah."

 

He grinned and deep throated me. I'm not sure how I stayed on my feet. He went to work on me and, in an embarrassingly short time, I was shooting down his throat. He pushed me back gently and I sat down hard on the bed. He was still on his knees, watching me and grinning. 

 

"Good to know I haven't forgotten how to do that." 

 

I watched mesmerized as his tongue slipped out to lap up the little bit of my cream that had dripped down the side of his mouth. I moaned and he chuckled again. 

 

Leaning toward me, he gripped my pants. I lifted my ass enough for him to get them down my legs. His fingers left a trail of heat along my legs as he took his time drawing them slowly down. His hands moved back up to rub at my thighs once they were bare. He left my pants around my ankles while he pulled off my boots. Once I was naked, I scooted back on the bed.

 

"There are lube and condoms in my jacket pocket."

 

He smiled as he turned to pick up his own coat, to remove one from his pocket. Then he fished in my pocket and got one of mine. He dropped them and the lube on the table by the bed. Now, I was puzzled. He had only paid for one fuck: why would we need two condoms?

 

He got on the bed next to me and pulled me close, kissing me again. Well, he had paid for kissing so I opened for him to enter my mouth. I made up my mind right then that if this guy came back, I wouldn't charge for the kisses next time. I had never been so thoroughly kissed. His hands moved over me slowly, rubbing then pinching my nipples. 

 

This was new as well. I was used to being a receptacle, a hole. This guy was acting as though he were my lover. Not that I was going to complain. It felt good to have someone treat me as if my feelings mattered. He made me come and it appeared he intended for me to get hard again before he fucked me. Men, for a large portion of my life, had used me for sex. But even though he was paying me, I didn't feel used with him. 

 

His mouth had wandered down to find a nipple. He sucked and nipped at it until I felt like screaming. My cock had hardened again. Hell I was only twenty, it didn't take much. His hand wrapped around me and he stroked me slowly. 

 

Propping himself up on an elbow, he smiled at me.

 

"You're very beautiful, do you know that? Such a nice thick cock. I bet most of your clients don't pay much attention to it, do they?"

 

I was shocked. Where the hell did this guy come from? It took me a minute to realize he was waiting for an answer. 

 

"No, my *clients* are usually only interested in their own and how far up me they can stick it."

 

"Then they're stupid. Sex is much more enjoyable when your partner gets off on it too." 

 

He didn't seem to require an answer to that. His head dropped and my nipple disappeared into his mouth again. I closed my eyes and floated on the sensation. One of his legs slipped between mine and I spread for him. He continued to play with my nipples while one of his big hands rolled my balls in their sac. I moaned when the hand moved lower and his fingers rubbed lightly over my hole. 

 

He raised up, leaning over my body to get the lube from the bedside table. I watched as he squeezed a generous portion of lube on his fingers. It was good to know he planned on getting me well-greased first. I'd been around the block lots of times but never with anyone that big. 

 

His finger worked its way inside me slowly. He fucked me with just that one finger until it was slipping easily in and out of my hole. Putting more lube on his fingers, he began the same process with two fingers. By the time he got around to three I was panting. 

 

"Do you want to come again?"

 

"God! Yes."

 

"Then do it, boy."

 

His words commanded followed by his mouth covering my cock, as his fingers rubbed hard over my prostate. I jerked and unloaded into his mouth again. When I went still, he pulled off my cock but kept his fingers moving slowly in and out of my ass.

 

I opened my eyes to see him smiling at me.

 

"Has anyone ever told you that you taste good?"

 

"You're the first one to sample me."

 

"I'll take that as a no."

 

His fingers slipped out of me and I moaned at the loss. I was becoming quite attached to the feel of them in my ass. I watched as he wiped his hand on the sheet, waiting for whatever came next. He picked up the lube and reached for my hand. I watched—puzzled--as he squeezed some onto my fingers. He pulled my hand down to his ass, guided my fingers inside him and made a little grunting sound. His other hand reached to guide my head down to his cock.

 

He had made me come twice, it was certainly his turn. I relaxed my throat and tried to take him all in. My gag reflex decided it was time to put in an appearance. 

 

"You don't have to deep throat me. Just rub my prostate and suck the head. Tongue the slit. That's it. Yeah, just like that."

 

I followed his instructions while working in his ass. This again was new to me. Like I had said, I was used to being a hole, nothing more. His hand reached down, one of his fingers entered next to mine pushing it at an angle. I felt the gland as he pushed my finger in deeper. 

 

He moaned, "Oh yeah! That's the spot. Rub it hard and take the head back in your mouth."

 

Again I obeyed. He growled as his come began to erupt into my mouth. The hand that was on my head tightened painfully in my hair. I tried to swallow but there was too much. His hand released its death grip on my hair. 

 

He lay there panting, one hand still on my head, the other lazily moving our fingers against his prostate. He opened his eyes and grinned at me.

 

"Guess your clients never had you finger them either?"

 

"No."

 

"Maybe I should be charging you, for the sex ed." 

 

He laughed then, a deep contagious laugh. I laughed with him, imprinting this memory deeply, not expecting more than the one night. That's when I noticed his brown eyes for the first time.

 

"We need to clean up a little. Guess you didn't have room for all of your protein drink?"

 

I know I was blushing as I stuttered, "Sorry."

 

His thumb rubbed over my bottom lip, smearing his come down onto my chin. "No need to apologise. I was only teasing." 

 

I jumped up, "Lie still, I'll take care of it for you." 

 

I got a wet cloth from the bathroom and came back to see him smiling.

 

"What?"

 

"Just trying to decide if the view is better coming or going."

 

I blushed again. What was this? I was a sure thing, bought and paid for. Why all the flirtation?

 

I cleaned him quickly and blushed as I took the cloth back to the bathroom. When I came back out, he was propped up on the bed, still smiling that great smile. I knee-walked across the bed to him. His big hands closed on me, pulling me down to lie on his chest. One hand wandered over my body slowly, the other carded through my hair. 

 

He held me like that for so long, I almost dozed off. It felt so good to be held and touched this tenderly. 

 

I hadn't had much tenderness in my life. My mother had died when I was six. My father was a drunk and abusive to me. Then came the men who used my body. I had learned early to take what I could get from them. Guess you could say I had been a whore for a long time.

 

His hand slipped down, his fingers began rubbing over my hole slowly, making no move to enter me. His other hand turned my head for more kisses. Kissing was more intimate for me than anything else. I had saved my kisses in the past for the only person I thought had felt something for me. Found out what a fool I was the night he gave me to a couple of his friends. 

 

When his finger entered me, it slid in easily, I was so relaxed from the times he had made me come. I moaned into his kisses as one finger became two. God, if he acted like this with a whore, I wondered how he acted with someone he cared about.

 

"Rise up on your knees for me."

 

I obeyed and watched as he caressed my cock until he had me hard again. Stretching out to the side he grabbed one of the condoms from the table. He was only semi-hard. I must have given him a puzzled look.

 

"You're going first."

 

He opened the condom and rolled it onto me. Then picked up the lube to coat me liberally. 

 

"I…I've never…"

 

"It's ok. You can do it, it's not rocket science." That teasing smile was back. 

 

I watched as he rolled over, pulling the pillows up under his hips, spreading his legs wide for me. I positioned myself between his legs and froze. He twisted his head to look at me.

 

"What's wrong?"

 

"What if I hurt you? I mean I wouldn't do it on purpose, but if I do…you won't hit me, will you?"

 

"Do you get hit a lot?"

 

"Sort of comes with the territory."

 

"No, I won't hit you, ever. It's ok if it hurts. I expect it to. I haven't done this in a long time. Just means tomorrow I'll have a reminder of a very pleasant evening. Come here, do me."

 

The smile was back, showing his even white teeth. I knew right then that I could fall in love with him. //Stupid! Don't even think that, Alexei. He's a customer, nothing more. You probably won't ever see him again. Another first for me. 'Sex ed' he'd said. Yeah, it was certainly turning into an educational night.// 

 

I positioned myself at his hole and pushed forward carefully. He sucked in his breath as I breached the muscle ring. I stopped again. This time, all he did was twist and raise an eyebrow. So I started to move in him. //Is this how I feel to the men who fuck me?// 

 

He was tight, but after a few strokes, he seemed to relax and began pushing back toward me. 

 

"Shift up a little. Fuck! That's the spot. Harder, boy."

 

Harder? No problem. I started rutting, pounding hard into his body. His muscles tightened down on me, pulling me deeper into him. I was so close again. I tried to slow down. 

 

"NO, don't…Hard…do it hard."

 

"I can't hold it much longer, I'm gonna come."

 

"Go ahead, just don't slow down."

 

I obeyed again, wondering if he always got his way.

 

I screamed this time as I came. Screamed with the pleasure of coming inside his tight ass. I could feel his muscles working on me. I collapsed on his back, panting, trying to breathe again. He continued to work those muscles on me until I was sure that every drop of come I was ever likely to produce had been pulled from my body. 

 

We lay there until I was breathing normally. Then he moved, so I was rolled onto the bed next to him. He smiled at me again before his mouth covered mine. I watched as he slipped the condom off me and got up to go get a warm washcloth. He cleaned me carefully then threw the cloth toward the bathroom. 

 

He sat beside me on the bed, picked up the lube to prepare me for the grand finale. His fingers opened and stretched me gently. 

 

"I know you aren't a virgin but I'll go slow. If I hurt you, tell me and I'll back off, give you all the time you need. Understand? Don't pretend. I'm not into causing pain."

 

I swallowed hard and nodded. I watched as he stroked himself a few times before putting on the condom. He coated it heavily before kneeling between my legs. He grabbed the pillows as I raised my hips for him. 

 

My legs were pulled high over his shoulders as he rubbed the head of his cock against me. He pushed forward and I felt the head enter me. True to his word, he took his time. His brown eyes watching for any sign of pain. At the slightest flinch, he pulled back slightly. Finally, after an eternity, I felt his balls against my ass. 

 

He smiled then, "Ok?"

 

"Yeah, I'm fine."

 

"Good, because I really want to fuck you now." The smile had become a leer that was enough to make my cock think it wanted to play again. I was still young enough for my hormones to be in high gear. 

 

He pulled out then and pushed back in. Slowly. I moaned. 

 

I heard his chuckle, "What's wrong?"

 

"Will you just fuck me? I'm ready."

 

That got me another laugh. His hands gripped my hips, lifting me higher, and he got down to business. His rhythm strong and sure as he fucked me. I wanted to push toward him but he had me in a tight grip. *He* was controlling this, not me. 

 

The next day, I would find his fingerprints on my hips and smile as I traced each one. 

 

I mentally gave over control to him, letting my body experience all of him. Breathing deeply to imprint his scent. Watching his eyes darkened to black the closer he got to coming. Enjoying the feel of his hands as his fingers dug into me. 

 

"Stroke yourself, I want you to come for me again." His voice was hoarse with lust. 

 

His thrusts, harder and faster, as I gripped my cock and followed orders again. 

 

"Come with me. Now!" 

 

I went off like a Roman candle on the fourth of July. He rammed in deep one more time and I could feel him pulsing in me. His grip tightened down even harder as I wailed with the pleasure of being so totally possessed. 

 

I came down slowly, hearing his harsh breathing, matching it with my own. I looked up to see warm, sated eyes as a beautiful smile curved his lips.

 

"I just love an obedient partner." Again the tease in his voice.

 

He stayed buried in me until our breathing had calmed. He pulled slowly out of me, as careful leaving me as he had been entering. He disposed of the condom in the trash then held out his hand to me.

 

"Is it extra to shower together?"

 

"No, I'll give you that one for free." I took his hand and let him haul me up as he laughed again. 

 

He bathed me and I enjoyed the tender care. I tried to show him as much care when he handed the soap to me. All too soon we were dressed and ready to leave. 

 

At the door, he turned and pulled me in close, to kiss me again. 

 

"Thanks, that was pretty fantastic."

 

In the car, he looked at me, "Want me to drop you back where I picked you up?"

 

"No, just drop me at the bus stop. I'm going to head home."

 

"So early? Don't you usually work later?" 

 

"I've had a good night plus I'm tired."

 

"Won't your *manager* get upset if you call it a night?"

 

"I don't have a *manager*. So I can call it a night whenever I want. I'm in school. I do this to cover the expenses that the scholarship doesn't."

 

Something in his eyes changed then, "You're in school? What year?"

 

"I didn't start until second semester last year so I'm still a freshman. Didn't expect that, huh?"

 

"No, I didn't. I can drop you at the campus if you want."

 

"I can just get the bus. I don't want to put you out."

 

"You won't be. I pass near there."

 

The ride was quiet. I watched his profile as he drove. He wasn’t what most people would consider a handsome man. He was losing his hair already and that turns off a lot of people. But he was a presence that few people would be able to ignore. He had a great body to go with that big cock. Hands strong and able. I found myself wondering what it would be like to belong to him. 

 

I had asked him to drop me at the library, not really wanting him to know exactly where I lived. As I reached for the door handle, his hand closed on my arm. I turned back to look at him.

 

"I...ah. Goodnight." 

 

I got out of the car and he drove away. I stood there wondering what he was thinking then mentally shook myself and turned to head for my room. My dreams that night were populated with him. The feel of him, his scent, his brown eyes and his smiles. 

 

We had met our future that night and didn't even know it. 

 

It was two weeks before he came back. 

 

When his car pulled up, I didn't even bother leaning in the window, I just opened the door and slid into the seat with him. He reached a long arm out to me and I flowed up against him to be kissed. 

 

It became a pattern, regular as clockwork, every two weeks. That second night, he told me to call him Sergei. I gave him the name my mother had called me, Alexei. It just seemed to go with Sergei. My nights with him made the other men I saw look all the more horrible. He was unfailingly kind and gentle. He gave me such pleasure that I felt guilty for taking his money. I even teased one night that the sex ed was worth more than he was paying me. He laughed and rolled me over to suck on my neck. 

 

Then came a week when he didn't show up. I figured that something had come up. I mean, we weren't dating, it was business, right? But as the weeks went by and he didn't show up, I became depressed. He had been so kind I felt as if he should have at least said goodbye. 

 

++++++++++++++++++

 

I turned the corner and sighed with relief. He was there, in his usual place, usual pose, but something was different. I pulled up and he looked at the car then turned and started walking down the street. Damn! I'd have to turn around and I would be on the wrong side of the street. Fuck! I threw the car in park, took the keys and started after him.

 

"Alexei!"

 

A blond boy pushed away from the wall, "Hey, man, if Alexei doesn't want to play, I will." 

 

Before I could say a word, Alexei was slamming him against the wall, "Stay out of this, Brandon."

 

"What's the matter with you? He's just a john."

 

I put my hand on his shoulder, "Alexei, let him go. We need to talk. Come on. I'll buy you dinner."

 

One of the other boys yelled, "Ohhhh, Alexei has a date with Daddy."

 

I turned to look at him disdainfully, "Daddy wouldn't do *you* for free."

 

I got some laughs and the boy decided he had an appointment somewhere away from me. I had caught Alexei turning out of the corner of my eye and felt him let go of Brandon. I still had my hand on his shoulder as it slumped in resignation. 

 

I kept my hand on his shoulder as we walked back to the car. He slouched in the seat, not saying a word on the drive to the restaurant. I glanced his way at the lights but he was facing away from me. I picked a place where I knew the food was good but where I felt he wouldn't feel too out of place.

 

Still not speaking, he followed me in and slumped down at the table. I watched him as the waiter brought water, recited the specials and then left us to decide.

 

In the months we had been seeing each other, it hadn't been just sex. The sex was fantastic. For all his experience, he was still naïve. It was such fun teaching him new things, watching his eyes blaze when I found a new way of turning him on. Seeing the smouldering fire in those green eyes before he came for me. I knew from his reactions that no one had ever cared to find out what worked for him.

 

We had talked on the drives back and forth. On the nights he was with me, there were no other men. I got there early and I made sure I wore him out. I dropped him at the library each time. I knew he was being cautious, not letting me know where he lived. I could have found out, but I hadn't felt a need. I probably should have. Had I known, he wouldn't be sitting like a condemned man across from me. 

 

"Alexei, what do you want to eat?"

 

"I'm not hungry. Don't you want to get down to business?"

 

"Alexei, I want to talk. To explain."

 

"You don't have to explain to me. I'm just the whore you fuck twice a month. You probably just got tired of me and found someone else for a while. It's ok. We can get out of here, you don't need to feed me first." 

 

I signalled to the waiter, "We'll have two steaks, medium, bake potatoes loaded, salad with blue cheese."

 

"I don't like sour cream and I'd rather have Italian dressing."

 

I smiled and nodded at the waiter. He left and I turned back to Alexei. 

 

"I'm sorry I upset you. My father passed away and I've been out of town taking care of the estate. I didn't know how to get in touch with you to tell you. It was sudden and I couldn't wait around until Friday."

 

His eyes had softened as I spoke. Those emerald eyes give away his every thought if you just know how to read them. His hand started to reach toward me then he stopped, realizing where we were. 

 

"I'm sorry, Sergei. I thought…."

 

"I know what you thought. I don't blame you; I probably would have reached the same conclusion in your place. Can we just forget it and have a nice dinner? Then I have something to show you."

 

"Sure."

 

"Talk to me, Alexei, about normal day to day things. How is school going?"

 

He became animated as he told me about the class he had started with the new semester. How the professor had taken him under his wing. I felt a jealous twinge but the subject was changed quickly so I figured that it was just a professor impressed with a bright pupil. By the time dinner was over, I was relaxed, the stress of the last two months gone. 

 

In the car he leaned over and kissed me. "I've been wanting to do that ever since I found out why you hadn't been around. I missed you, Sergei."

 

"I missed you, too. I have a surprise for you."

 

I started the car and drove to an apartment building near the college. It was in an older section of town but still very respectable. He looked at me, baffled, as I led the way. I opened the door with my key and guided him up the stairs. On the second floor, I opened a door and reached to turn on the light inside. I watched his eyes as he took in the furnishings of the studio apartment. 

 

The kitchen area was small with a table just big enough for two. A college student didn't need much in the way of a kitchen. Against the bathroom wall was a big desk with bookshelves on either side. It was next to the windows so he would have lots of natural light. There was a small fireplace around which I had arranged a small sofa and comfortable armchair. The bed was not visible since it was on the other side of a chest high partition, but since the space was so large, it was a king size.

 

He turned to look at me, "Sergei, whose place is this?"

 

"It's yours if you want it. I hate motel rooms. This place doesn't cost much more than what I was spending on them. I felt awful that I had no way to contact you when I had to leave. If you're here, then I'll always know how to reach you. Besides it will give you more privacy than a dorm so you can study without interruptions."

 

"And it gives you?"

 

"Fridays. *Every* Friday."

 

"Just Fridays? No mid week quickies? No lazy Sunday mornings?"

 

"Only if you are agreeable to those things." 

 

He moved sinuously up to me, rubbing against me like a cat. "I'm agreeable, very agreeable. Anticipatory, even." 

 

"Alexei, it means no tricking. I won't share you while we have this arrangement. So, if that isn't acceptable, say so now."

 

"What if I say it isn't?"

 

"Then we make use of the bed, I fuck your ass raw, take you back to the campus, and see you in two weeks."

 

I saw a flash of pain in his eyes before he turned away. He was fishing. The little brat was fishing for something. The light bulb went on. He had a crush on me. Well, it made sense. I knew from his conversations that no one else had cared if he was happy or not. He had told me about this guy who he had thought cared for him and how the guy had given him to two friends one night. The friends had torn him so badly he had needed stitches.

 

I stood there for a minute as he walked over to look out the window. How much was I willing to reveal to this boy who consumed my thoughts, my dreams, my soul it seemed? Ah, fuck it! He would outgrow the crush but for now, I could cater to his fantasies. It would probably just mean sweeter sex. In addition, I'd be telling him part of the truth. 

 

I had looked at the truth when my father died. I wanted this boy. Wanted it to be forever. But I knew I could never keep anyone so beautiful.

 

"Alexei."

 

"Yes." His voice so soft I almost didn't hear it.

 

"I thought the tricking was just for the money. I didn't think you liked doing it."

 

"I don't."

 

"I also thought that you like what *we* do."

 

"I do. What you are asking for is still being a whore. Just a full time one." 

 

"Have I ever treated you like a whore? Aside from the money that is?" 

 

"Never. Not even the first night."

 

I walked to stand behind him, not touching yet, waiting for a sign that he would accept my touch.

 

"A whore could only give me pleasure in bed, Alexei. You give me pleasure in conversation, with your smiles, in the way you lit up tonight when you talked about all the things you are learning. No whore would have troubled my mind when I had to leave and couldn't say why."

 

He shifted then, just a tiny fraction that I would have missed if I'd not been waiting for it. I slid my arms around him then pulled him back against my chest. 

 

"So, are you saying you want to spend time with me that isn't in bed?"

 

"Yes. I'm also saying that since you told me about being raped, I've worried about you. You will be safe with me."

 

"It wasn't rape. I didn't fight them."

 

"You didn't want it, that makes it rape. If you had fought them, you would have probably been hurt more. This arrangement will work for both of us. I'll see that the utilities and rent are paid. I'll keep food in the cupboards. You can use you scholarship money for school expenses. We can have privacy, comfort. We can *play* in ways we never could in a motel. It'll be fun, Alexei. I promise."

 

I dropped my mouth to his throat and sucked hard at the spot I had found got him hottest. He moaned and dropped his head back on my shoulder, turning to give me the best access. With one hand I cupped his already thickening cock, pulling him back tighter against me so he would feel me getting hard. 

 

I took my time with him that night, making up for lost time. He moaned and writhed under me as I brought him to climax over and over. I wasn't sure what time it was when he begged me to stop. I dragged him into the shower for a fast cleaning then settled down next to him, holding him close as we slept. 

 

We spent Saturday morning moving him from the dorm to the studio. Saturday afternoon, we hit the grocery and drug stores. Saturday night, I made him beg again. Sunday, we wandered the flea market, buying a few things to make his new place a home. Late in the afternoon I fucked him silly then went home.

 

I stayed away until Tuesday. God! I was so hooked. 

 

Friday night, I brought a bag, took over a drawer in the dresser and stowed a suit and some casual clothes in the closet. He watched me unpack with a soft smile on his face. Once the last item was stored, he jumped me. 

 

Yeah, I was hooked and intended to ride it for as long as possible. 

 

++++++++++++++++++

 

I was humming as I put away the last of the laundry. I'd been in the studio since early January. Sergei had bought all kinds of little things to make it homier for me. The bookcases had been filled to overflowing, every Saturday bringing a trip to the bookstore. There were nice prints on the walls, Russian tea glasses on the shelf in the kitchen area. I smiled as I put his clean underwear in the drawer, thinking he needed some new ones.

 

By that point he knew most of my history. I had told him the truth about my past. He had turned red with rage when I talked about how I had lost my virtue. That had been hard for me to tell him. I was afraid he would turn from me when he realized just how often my body had been used. Instead he wanted to look up the first guy who had used me and *talk* to him. I knew talking wasn't what he had in mind. 

 

I heard his key in the lock and ran to meet him. Jumping, I wrapped my legs and arms around him. He staggered back, laughing, one hand gripped my ass and the other closed the door turning the lock. Then both hands were cupping my ass as his mouth devoured me. He pulled back, giving my lips one last slow lick and smiled at me.

 

"I wasn't expecting you tonight. But I'm glad you're here. Should we make dinner or fuck first?"

 

"Feels to me like you're ready to fuck. How about we take the edge off and then *I'll* make dinner."

 

"Ah shit, Sergei. I'm doing better. I haven't burned anything in two weeks."

 

"I don't think canned soup counts." But his smile took the sting out of the words. Sergei was an excellent cook and I was learning. I only burned stuff when I tried to cook and read at the same time. I just got too wrapped up in the book. 

 

"Why are you here tonight?" I asked him as he walked toward the bed with me still clinging like a monkey to him.

 

"I'm not going to be here Friday. I have to work late and I don't know when I'll get through. Since that's cutting into our weekend, I wanted to see you tonight."

 

"Will you be here Saturday?" I was surprised at how hurt I was. Since January he had spent every Friday night with me, just as he said he would when he first brought me here. I had become quite addicted to waking up in his arms on Saturdays.

 

"At least part of the day. I may have to work that night again. I'll make it up to you. When the semester is over, we'll take a week and go somewhere. I have a friend who has a place in Florida. He said I could use it any time. Do you think you'd like that?" 

 

"Yeah, that'd be great." 

 

By that time he was lowering us onto the bed and I forgot everything but what he was doing to me.

 

Friday afternoon, I was coming out of the library when a friend came up to me. "Hey, Alex, you busy tonight?"

 

"Not really, why?"

 

"I heard about this new club I want to check out. A really freaky place and I don't want to go alone. Why don't you come with me?"

 

"I should probably study. I've got a test Monday."

 

"Hey, man, this is college. Don't you know you're supposed to have a little fun? Come on, I promise we won't stay late. Maybe you can find a new boyfriend since *he's* leaving you high and dry on a Friday night."

 

"He had to work. It's not like he didn't want to see me."

 

"Hey, I'm joking. I know he spends a lot of time with you. Please, go. I promise I'll protect you from the big bad leather dudes."

 

I laughed then, this little Nelly telling me he would protect me. Yeah, right.

 

"Ok. I'll go, but if you find someone you want to go home with just make sure I'm in a cab first."

 

I dressed nice but not seductive. I was going out with a friend, not looking to get laid. He picked me up around nine and we headed out to this new club.

 

I was still pretty naïve then. Hadn't checked out the alternate scenes much. I'd never had any trouble getting laid so I didn't hang out at bars. Since Sergei had given me a home, I didn't want to cruise. I was well satisfied with our sex life. 

 

The place was jumping when we got there. Lots of leather, the smell of men in lust. The usual drugs. I ordered a soda. After seeing what booze turned my father into, I was keeping away from it. We stayed together for a while until a guy asked him to dance. I found an out of the way corner to people watch and sipped my soda.

 

When Sergei came in, I thought I was seeing things. He was semi dressed. Tight black leather pants, a harness type thing that emphasized his chest. He looked as if he had been oiled; his body glistened under the lights. A pair of handcuffs hanging from his belt. 

 

It would have been a hot fantasy to play with him except for one thing. The boy he was leading on a leash. 

 

The guy had blond hair, was shorter than me, thin but not anorexic. He was wearing even less than Sergei was. His only article of clothing was a leather jock. Unless you want to count the choke chain and the leash as clothing. 

 

I watched, my heart aching, as Sergei led him over to a table, sat down, the boy kneeling at his feet. After he ordered a drink from the waiter, he grabbed a handful of the boy's hair yanked his head back and kissed him. 

 

I'm not sure how I got out of there. I don't even know how I ended up at my professor's door. By dawn I was leaving town with Spender. I wouldn't see Sergei again for several years.

 

+++++++++++++++

 

As I opened the door to the apartment, I was mentally cursing the fact that I would have to tell Alexei I wouldn't be able to stay with him that night. I had brought enough cash with me for him to go shopping after I had to leave. Was hoping that the idea of spending his grocery money on junk food would help eliminate some of the pouting I was sure he would do.

 

This latest assignment was fucking with my personal life. Plus there was the macho posturing and the homophobe partner I had to deal with. He kept saying he had nothing against gays but man, did he tense up every time I touched him! How the fuck they thought he would make a good choice to 'act' as my slave I don't know. 

 

The door opened to total silence. That alone told me something was wrong. He always had the TV or the stereo going. He just didn't seem to function well in silence. A quick search told me that he was gone. The clothes I had bought him were still there but everything he had come to me with was gone. 

 

I spent the rest of the day trying to find him. The professor he was close to swore he had no idea where Alexei could be. I hadn't met any of his friends so I couldn't ask them. A check of plane, train, and bus terminals turned up no one fitting his description leaving town. 

 

The next few weeks I spent ever spare minute in the apartment hoping he would come home, and wallowing in self-pity. Wondering what had happened between my goodbye kisses on Friday morning and Saturday that made him leave. 

 

It would be years before I found out. 

 

I was sitting at my desk when Kim announced that the new agent was here to see me. I told her to send him in. I looked up as the door opened and the words I had been about to say died on my lips. 

 

Alexei was obviously as surprised as I was but he shuttered his eyes quickly. That was new; he hadn't been able to do that when we had been together. He had become a man since I had last seen him. But he was even more beautiful if that were possible. My cock hardened just from the sight of him standing there. I put on my best AD face and willed my cock to behave.

 

"Come in, Agent…?"

 

"Krycek, Sir. Alex Krycek."

 

"Have a seat, Agent."

 

I'm not sure how I got through that interview with him. As soon as I sent him off to the basement to meet Mulder, I went into the bathroom and jerked off, remembering the last lingering look he had given me before he left my office. I knew I hadn't gotten over him and that look made me think he might still feel something for me.

 

++++++++++

 

I opened the door to my new boss's office, anxious to get my first look at the man I had been sent to seduce and spy on. He looked up and I got hard. Sergei! Oh *fuck*! This is who they wanted me to ruin? Even with the changes the years had brought, he still made me weak in the knees. 

 

I had told myself if I ran into him now that I was back in D.C., I would be cool. After all, it had been years and he had never loved me. I obviously hadn't been able to satisfy him back then or he wouldn't have been out with that other guy. 

 

I had been with other lovers since him. None of them ever made me feel what he had made me feel. I realized as I sat across the desk from him that I was still hopelessly in love with him. What the fuck was I going to do now? 

 

Well, at least seducing him would be pleasurable for me. I already knew what he had to offer me there. And all the *training* Spender had put me through would make it possible for me to do kink for him. I had been told that they 'suspected' Skinner preferred a piece of ass to a piece of pussy. 

 

They wanted him outed or they wanted to blackmail him into doing what they wanted. I knew I couldn't help them do either thing to him. I'm not sure how I got through the interview. I do know as soon as he directed me to go meet Mulder, I was out of there and in the men's room. I shoved my handkerchief in my mouth to muffle the sound as I jerked off quickly.

 

Somehow I got through the day with Mulder. I was surprised they didn't want me to make a play for him as well. Back then I didn't know who his real father was. If I had, I'd have known why. I did a little snooping during the day. It's amazing what you can learn when you ask the right questions. 

 

At seven that night, I stood outside the outer door, took a deep breath and opened it, an excuse planned if his assistant was still around. I knew he was still there because his car was downstairs. I was already semi-hard and I hadn't even see him yet. His assistant was obviously gone so I walked toward the inner door that was standing open. 

 

His chair was turned toward the window as if he was looking at the scenery. I'd already noticed there wasn't much of a view from that high up in the Hoover. I wondered if he was thinking of me or if the blond guy was still around. Ok 'Once more into the breach, dear friend.' I almost giggled at my choice of metaphors.

 

"Sergei." 

 

The chair turned and he looked at me. "What took you so long? Kim's been gone for an hour."

 

"You've been waiting for me?"

 

"I knew we would need to talk sooner or later. Knowing you as I do, I figured sooner. And here, where you know I have to behave."

 

"What makes you think I want you to behave?" I pushed the door closed behind me and walked over to his desk. 

 

He stood as I got closer and growled at me. "Don't start anything you aren't prepared to finish, boy."

 

"Oh, I intend to finish and I'm *not* a boy." The cocky grin I had practiced firmly in place. 

 

The grin didn't last long. His big hands reached out and I was yanked up against a body that hadn't lost any of its firmness and the cock was every bit as big as I remembered. One hand grabbed my hair, using it to keep me where he wanted me as his mouth devoured mine. The other big paw was squeezing my ass as he ground our cocks together. 

 

My arms slipped around him. The body remembered even better than the mind. When he let me breathe again, I was clinging to him. Fuck! It'd been years but it felt like yesterday, too. His nose was burrowing into my throat, the hands kneading and stroking. 

 

"You got taller. But you still smell better than fresh baked bread."

 

"Bread, Sergei?"

 

"I love fresh baked bread. And I bet you taste better buttered, too."

 

I felt the grin against my skin, but wasn't prepared for the nip when it came. But his tongue followed licking away the small pain.

 

"So are you telling me the only thing you have for lube in this office are butter packets from the cafeteria?" 

 

"No, this isn't Last Tango in Paris. And I don't fuck my agents but I'll make an exception for you. I don't keep supplies here. If we're gonna continue this, and if feels like you approve of the idea, we need to take it elsewhere."

 

I wanted to be light, teasing but his hands and mouth were working on me and my body remembered far too well the heights he could take it to that no one else had ever managed. 

 

I croaked out, "Let's go." 

 

He stepped back, grinning that lecherous grin that always got me hard if I wasn't already. Turning, he grabbed up his jacket. I reached without thought to help him with it, smoothing it over his shoulders the way I did all those years ago. My hand moving up to rub at the bit of hair left. He leaned into my touch, making me smile. Guess his body remembered, too. 

 

"Seems like you used to have more of this." 

 

"Don't worry, I'm not losing it anywhere else."

 

"Good. You know how I love the way it feels against my nipples."

 

"Shut up and let's get out of here before I'm tempted to ransack Kim's desk for hand lotion."

 

I stepped back. Waited for him to shut down the lights and followed him to his car. I slumped down in the seat, not wanting to be seen in his car if they had someone watching him. I also kept quiet and decided I'd check the car for bugs after he was asleep. 

 

He pulled into a drugstore parking lot and I looked a question at him. 

 

"Need to pick up a couple of things. Be right back."

 

Looked like the blond was no longer around. Good! I didn't plan on sharing him any more. While he was gone, I did a quick check of his car, coming up empty. Since there are only so many effective places to hide a bug, I relaxed. I knew his place wasn't bugged because I had asked. I had been told they wanted me to take care of that, once I seduced him.

 

He came out and handed a bag to me. As he started the car, I looked in the bag to see if my guess was correct. 

 

"Damn, Sergei, you planning on using all of this tonight?"

 

"What's the matter, Alexei? If I remember correctly, you used to be *up* for it."

 

"I was twenty. Are you telling me you are still *up* for it?"

 

He leered at me again and grabbed my hand pulling it to cover the evidence of him being *up*. I squeezed gently and his leer grew. "And I've jerked off twice since this morning."

 

"Three times." Damn! Why did I admit that? His eyes softened and the smile mutated to the one I used to catch on his face when he'd be watching me read or work on an assignment. Fuck, why had I run away? I should have stayed and offered to do whatever kind of kink he wanted. I should have fought for him.

 

He drove and I held on to that glorious part of him. I had no idea where we ended up because all my attention was on him. It was Friday. And Friday meant sex. It also meant that I had over forty-eight hours to learn the lay of the land so to speak. 

 

We were in a residential neighbourhood so that meant he was taking me home, not to a hotel. The stop at the drugstore told me that he wasn't in a relationship. If he was with someone, either we'd be at a hotel or he'd have lube and condoms at home for when the lover came over. 

 

He pulled into a driveway and hit the button on the garage door opener. It wasn't a huge house but I knew it would be comfortable. In the short time we had been together, he had made a home for me. The only one I had ever really had. I wondered what he had done with the things he had bought for me. 

 

When I had left, I had only taken the things I had gone to him with, none of the things he had bought for me. Well, that isn't quite true. I took the ring he had given me. I hadn't worn it on my hand since then but it was on a chain and hung around my neck. I had taken if off only during training and then only so the chain wouldn't be broken. 

 

I wondered how he would react to that. Part of me wanted to hide it, but the major part wanted him to know I still had it. I argued with myself right up until he ripped my shirt off as he had me bent backward over the trunk of his car. 

 

++++++++++++++++++ 

 

The trip to my place had been pretty quiet. I was mulling over the fact that he obviously still wanted to fuck me. That and the changes to him. The shutter he had acquired to hide his eyes, the longer legs. But some things hadn't changed, like the way he fitted against my body, the green of eyes aroused, his hardness pressing against mine. 

 

When we got out of the car, I waited for him to come around the end then pounced. My mouth devoured his as my hands grabbed his ass lifting. His legs wrapped around me as I bent him back over the trunk of the car. I grabbed a handful of shirt and ripped, loving the sounds of buttons plinking on the car and floor.

 

I traced his jaw line, smiled against his skin as he arched to give me his throat. Kissing downward, I came to the chain he was wearing. I raised my head to look at the warm wide silver chain shining against his skin and saw the ring I had given him laying in the hollow of his collarbone. 

 

I looked up into his eyes and the boy who had given me the greatest pleasure of my life looked back at me. The shutter gone. His emotions as open to me as they had been all those years ago. 

 

I kept my eyes locked to his as I found the clasp. Opening the chain I slipped the ring off, placing in on his chest. I refastened the chain, and picked up the ring. I felt the tightening of his body as he waited for my reaction.

 

The green eyes widened as I found his hand and slipped the ring onto his finger. The gasp as I raised the hand to kiss the ringed finger echoed in the garage. His legs tightened on me and his free hand caressed my hand as it held his.

 

I lifted him up then and started toward the house.

 

"Sergei, the bag, we need the bag."

 

I looked back to where the bag was lying on the floor by the car. Kind of hard to hold on to things when a horny man is trying to jump you. I squatted and he grabbed the bag. Holding the bag in the hand wrapped around me, he used the other to begin divesting me of my tie. 

 

By the time I got us to the bedroom he was sucking a mark on my neck that would raise more than one eyebrow on Monday. But I didn't care, he was back and this time I was making damn sure he stayed. Even if I had to hogtie him to my bed to do it. 

 

+++++++++++++++

 

I woke up to the smell and feel of Sergei wrapped around me. I had forgotten how wonderful it was to wake up in his arms. Sometimes I'd fall asleep that way with the other men I had known but they were always on the other side of the bed in the morning and pretty much had forgotten my name. Not that I really cared since I usually couldn't remember theirs. 

 

I managed to slip out of his arms without waking him. Heading toward the bathroom, I stopped to right the trashcan we had knocked over during our last trip to shower off the sweat before we went to sleep. I smiled down at the squeezed out KY tube. Another excuse to leave the house today. 

 

I was going to tell him I wanted to go back to my place and pick up some clothes. I would do that too, but I also was going to pick up props. Last night had reinforced my determination to be with him and make sure no one else was ever in his bed again. I figured the best way to do that was to show him I could play any kind of game he wanted. 

 

I peed and found a new toothbrush in the cabinet and used it, adding that to the shopping list I had going in my head. I was stepping out of the shower when he bellowed at me.

 

"Hey, why didn't you wake me?"

 

I stepped over to the open door and grinned at him. 

 

"You needed the rest, old man. I have plans for you later, but first I need to go buy us more lube and condoms. And I need to go get some clothes for Monday."

 

"Old man? If I remember correctly you were the one who said 'Stop, I'm exhausted.' Or was that someone else I was ramming into at the time?"

 

"No, that was me. But I'm getting my second wind and you are in so much trouble. My shirt seems to have lost all its buttons somehow. Can I borrow a tee shirt?"

 

"Top drawer on the left. I'll get dressed."

 

I moved hurriedly to him and pushed him back down. 

 

"No, you go back to sleep. I won't be gone long. Promise."

 

His eyes searched mine and I knew he was wondering if I was going to disappear. I reached down and cupped him through the sheet. 

 

"I'll hurry. I don't want to be trying to wash Wesson oil out of these sheets."

 

He pulled me down and kissed me so hard I felt it in my toes. 

 

"Hurry." 

 

I nodded and got dressed. I picked up his pants from the night before and fished out his keys asking a silent question. He nodded. A quick kiss on his bald head and I headed out the door. I left his car parked at the mall and took a cab to my place. I didn't expect anyone to be watching me but didn't take a chance. I watched carefully for any sign of a tail as I rode back to the mall with the bag I had packed. 

 

A fast trip to the toy store and back to his place. He was moving a load of laundry from the washer to the dryer when I pulled into the garage. Another basket was waiting to go into the washer. He smiled at me when I kissed him on the cheek as I headed past him.

 

In the bedroom, I quickly stripped, slipped on the cock ring I had bought, stroked myself erect. I fastened the new black leather collar around my neck. By the time he reached the room, I was lying in the centre of his big bed.

 

He stopped dead in the doorway. His eyes moved over me, slowly. No smile, no sign of pouncing as he had done the night before. 

 

"What's this?"

 

"I just thought I'd show you how important you are to me. I'll do what ever it takes to keep you this time. You can do anything you want to me. Bondage, toys, fisting, even blood play if you want that."

 

"Where the fuck is this coming from? I never hurt you when we were together."

 

"No. You had someone else for that." I couldn't suppress the bitterness in my voice.

 

"Boy, talk sense. What do you mean? You were the only one I was seeing. The only one I was making love to."

 

"I saw you with him."

 

"Him? Him who? There was no him."

 

"The night I left, I *saw* you. You told me you had to work."

 

"I did. I never lied to you. Now explain to me what you mean by this."

 

"You did once. You told me you were married."

 

"You know why I said that. Besides, I told you the truth when I got the apartment for you. Now tell me what you saw."

 

"You said you were working. A friend asked me to go to this new bar with him. I was so used to being with you on Friday night that I couldn't stand the idea of being alone. So I went with him. We had a drink and a guy asked him to dance. I found a corner to be as invisible as possible. I wasn't looking for a date."

 

"What was the name of this place?"

 

"Black Leather. I saw you come in, leading a blond boy on a leash. I watched him kneel at your feet. Saw you yank his head back and kiss him." My throat was so tight and dry, I barely got that last out. I had dropped my eyes, I didn't want to see the look on his face. 

 

"Go on. Tell me everything." His voice was hard. I inched toward the edge of the bed hoping he'd just throw me out. I was sure I had fucked up again.

 

"Finish telling me, Alexei." A command. I bet the blond jumped when he talked like that. 

 

"I was hurt. I thought you cared about me. I ran away. I loved you but I didn't know how to do the things you wanted. But I do now. I can give you anything..." I finally looked up to see his eyes blazing. Oh! Fuck! 

 

"You *Bastard*!" He was across the room in two strides and I flinched away from him. He shook his head and grabbed my arm, pulling me up. 

 

I was dragged down the hallway and pushed down in a chair next to his home computer. He signed on and I watched as he pulled up the FBI database. A personnel file began to download on the screen. Oh god! The blond was an agent. 

 

"I *told* you I had to work. We were there undercover. Believe me, I wouldn't fuck that homophobe if he were the last man on earth. I didn't *want* anyone but you. I was willing to wait. Hoping that when you finished school, you wouldn't decide you were finished with me."

 

I covered my face with my hands, moaning. I heard him shutting down the PC.

 

"Come on. I've got something you need to see."

 

He led me downstairs and then to a door in the kitchen. He opened the door and flipped on the light over the stairs. I followed him slowly down the steps. He was pulling dust covers off furniture. The furniture from the studio he had rented for me.

 

"I kept that fucking place for six months. Hoping you would come back. I spent a lot of nights in that bed remembering you, how you looked and smelled and felt when you came for me. Woke up a lot of mornings reaching for you. Then I'd go to work and snap at everyone who spoke to me. That's when the word surly became interchangeable with Skinner at the Hoover."

 

"Six months?"

 

"Yeah, six months. Then the lovesick idiot decided to create this shrine. I can count on one hand the number of times I've had sex since you left me. No one could compare to you. So I stuck with Hannah. At least I always know where she is." I didn't get the reference but his hand gesture told me what he meant. 

 

Well, Alexei, when you fuck up, you do it royally, don't you? I turned and started toward the stairs.

 

"Running again?"

 

"No. I figured you'd want me to leave. You tell me you've been with only a few men since me after I told you I know how to play games. I fucked up. I should have stayed and asked you. Instead I took off and got myself...never mind. I'll be dressed and out of here in a few minutes."

 

"You said upstairs you loved me. Was that...is that...over?"

 

"No. I'll go to my grave loving you. I wish I had a time machine so I could go back and start over."

 

"What's wrong with starting over now?"

 

"Because there's more and I don't think you'll want me when you hear it."

 

I watched as he straightened his spine even more. 

 

"Tell me. I don't want any secrets between us."

 

"The professor I told you about. He's a friend of Spender's."

 

He hissed. "Go ahead."

 

"I was supposed to seduce you so they could ruin you or blackmail you into doing what they want. So see, even if you can forgive me, I have to go. Yesterday, when I walked into your office, it was like I had just gotten out of your bed that morning. Everyone and everything else no longer mattered. I knew I wouldn't do what Spender wants. But I can't be in the same town with you, knowing all this and being without you."

 

"So you're going to run, again."

 

"It's the only way to protect you. Don't you see? Even if I lie to him, if we see each other, they would find out, sooner or later. Being so close, I can't trust myself to stay away."

 

"You aren't leaving me again. I won't let you."

 

"I have to. You would grow to hate me if I ruin your career and your reputation. I'll offer to do wet work or something. Anything that won't involve sex. After last night, I know I don't ever want anyone else." 

 

"You aren't leaving. I won't allow it." 

 

I turned away. There was no point in arguing with him. He grabbed me from behind. I was on the bare mattress with his weight holding me down before I knew what was happening. 

 

"Sergei, what the fuck are you doing?"

 

"You offered me something upstairs. I'm taking you up on the offer."

 

Holding on to my wrists with one of his big paws he worked his belt off with the other. The belt was soon wrapped around my wrists. He secured me to the bed then stood up. 

 

"That ought to hold you long enough for me to get something better."

 

He got up and walked across the room. I didn't struggle. There was no point. I could give him this. I was just sorry I hadn't done it all those years ago.

 

++++++++++

 

The cotton rope was in the utility cabinet where I knew it would be. I normally used it for tying equipment down in the truck when I went camping or fishing. I took it and my hunting knife back to the bed. I wanted him secure before I went upstairs for the lube and condoms. 

 

He watched silently as I cut lengths of rope. I tied them to the posts of the bed first. I secured his ankles. I knew I would have to release them later but for now, I wanted him helpless. Then I undid my belt from the bed but left it on his wrists until I had one secured to the bedpost. He didn't struggle or fight me. 

 

His cock, which had gone soft, as we had talked, was now hard again. This had never been my kink but I had to admit looking at him like that was making little Wally stand up and cheer. He looked beautiful all laid out like a feast for me. And feast I intended to do. 

 

"Don't go away. I'll be right back."

 

"Funny man. You should take that act on the road."

 

"Only with a big trunk to lock you in between shows."

 

I headed upstairs before he could answer that. The lube and condoms were by the bed where he had laid them out. I scooped up the lube and the towel but left the condoms. Like Lazarus Long said 'Take big bites.' 

 

I was about to take the biggest bite of my life. 

 

In the basement, I walked over and dropped the lube and towel next to him. His eyes had tracked my every move and widened when I made a point of only having two items in my hand. I stepped back and started to strip. His eyes watched me, his desire causing those eyes to darken. 

 

Once I was naked, I crawled between his legs and sucked his cock into my mouth. He hissed like a cat and I went down to the base. I used one hand to work his balls and the other to open the lube. I got another hiss as I worked a finger up inside him. 

 

I know his body well. It didn't take long for him to be pleading with me to let him come. 

 

"What's that? What do you want, boy?"

 

"I'm not a fucking boy! Damn you, let me come."

 

"Demanding, aren't you? Seems to me you offered me control upstairs. Isn't that why you are wearing this?"

 

I let go of his sac and reached to slip a finger under the leather collar. 

 

"It's very pretty and you look really hot in it, but it prevents me sucking on that beautiful neck."

 

I slipped my fingers out of his hole - I had worked up to three by then - used the towel to wipe my hand. I reached to open the collar, taking if off him. I lay full length on his body and began to suck and bite his neck. 

 

His body jerked under me. All of him straining toward me as far as the ropes would allow. He had come from me working on his neck in the past but the cock ring and my refusal to give him the contact he needed kept him on the edge now. 

 

His body had never been much of a mystery to me. His reactions always easy to read. Each new thing I had shown him, he had embraced and added to. I smiled against his throat as the whimpers turned into loud moans, the moans becoming words.

 

"Please! Please, Sergei! Let me come! I need to come! "

 

I covered his mouth and his sweet tongue pushed aggressively into my mouth. I pulled back and looked down at him, smiling.

 

"Pushy little sub, aren't you? You aren't going to come until my cock is up your sweet ass. *After* I come, you will be allowed to come. Maybe."

 

He screamed at me and I was glad I wasn't still munching on his neck. I moved down flicking first one nipple then the other with my tongue. Followed that with pinching them hard. His body arched up into the sensation. I moved farther down, spending several long minutes feasting on his belly button. 

 

He had enough give to the ropes to arch more if he dug in his heels. He did just that. So predictable. Hoping to get me back to sucking his dick. I was feeling generous so I sucked him deep into my throat. 

 

The whimpers started again then the litany of pleases.

 

"PleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePleasePlease!!!!!!!!!!"

 

I rose up and untied his legs. Lubed my cock liberally, smiling at his legs already lifting. I moved between them and he immediately wrapped them around me, pulling me closer. I positioned the head at his opening and pushed in slowly. He groaned with frustration.

 

"Hurry, Sergei! Need you! Need all of you!"

 

I was getting a little frantic by that point so I rammed forward. I got a long "Ahhhhhhhh" from him in return. I pumped in and out of his tightness. God, he felt so incredible with nothing between us. I knew I wouldn't last long. I reached hurriedly to get the ring off him and he winced as the blood flow picked up. 

 

"Don't you come yet. Not till I say. Do you hear me, boy?"

 

"I'm not a boy! *FUCK ME*."

 

"Every day for the rest of our lives, *boy*."

 

I slammed into him and let myself go. Coming so hard I felt light headed. I wrapped my fist around his cock, jerked it a couple of times and he screamed my name as he shot high into the air. I watched his face, his mouth open, eyes fuck drunk. His cock was still throbbing in my hand. 

 

"I love you, Sergei."

 

"I didn't say you could come yet."

 

"Bastard."

 

"The bastard who loves you."

 

I pulled out of him to the sound I think I had missed most from him. I got a bottle of water from the small fridge in the corner and held it for him to drink. Using a bottle that hadn't been chilled, I cleaned us up and lay down next to him.

 

"Sergei, aren't you going to untie me now?"

 

"No. Go to sleep. You're going to need the rest. 

 

+++++++++

 

Walter had kept me tied or cuffed for most of the weekend. He would have let me loose if I had been willing to swear that I would stay. He had finally worn me down and, late Sunday night, I had given him my word that I wouldn't leave unless we decided together it was the only thing to do. 

 

He was sure we could find a way out for me. I didn't believe that but loving him the way I did made me want to take all I could get while I could.

 

When Monday rolled around, I looked at my wrists after taking a shower. Walter came into the room to see me studying the bruises. 

 

"Sorry."

 

"Why? They wouldn't be this bad if I hadn't been so turned on I kept pulling at the ropes. My watch will cover one. I'll just have to be careful to keep my sleeves down. Maybe I should borrow one of your shirts. The sleeves are longer."

 

"Do that. I don't want Mulder getting ideas. I think he might go for the kinky stuff. If he saw those, he might start hitting on you."

 

"I know. He is sort of cute. But I think he'd go after you before he comes after me. He probably needs a daddy."

 

I rubbed against him as I spoke, smiling at the growing bulge in his trousers. 

 

"Stop that! We need to go to work. Although, how I'll keep my mind on work knowing you are in the building is beyond me."

 

"Want me to come up for a lunch time BJ? I can slip away from Mulder and you could ask Kim to run an errand for you."

 

"Ground rule: No sex at work. Understand? We will not give them that excuse. If Spender is looking to get something on me, that would be the ultimate thrill for him. If we get caught outside of work, the most that they would probably do is write me up for sexual harassment and transfer you."

 

"They might also fire you, Sergei. Please, won't you just let me leave now. I couldn't stand to lose you by ruining your career. It would kill me to be the one to give Spender what he wants."

 

"My career means nothing compared to you, Alexei. I've loved you from the first time I kissed you. When my father died, his last words to me were for me to not make the mistake he did. He said that, in the end, love is all that matters."

 

"It's easier to think that and feel it than it is to live it. I don't want to ever hurt you again."

 

"Leaving me would be the ultimate hurt, Alexei. We *will* find a way. For now, let's get to work and try to act normal."

 

Walter had given me a long loving kiss in the car before he opened the garage door. He also gave me his schedule for the day and an extra key so I wouldn't have to wait for him that night. I spent the day moving from fear of it crashing down on us, to joy at being his again. 

 

+++++++++++++++

 

Alex had been back in my life for several months when he disappeared again. I was frantic. He had given me his word he wouldn't leave me unless I agreed it was necessary. I would never agree to that. He thought the job was more important but that was simply not true. 

 

"He's gone, Sir. His apartment has been cleaned out. There's no sign of where he's gone or how he left. He's betrayed us."

 

"No, Mulder. He wouldn't do that."

 

"He has! He's working for that bastard. I found evidence in the car."

 

"You found what they wanted you to find, Mulder. Believe me. He may not be exactly what you were led to believe but he didn't betray you."

 

"You know something. What is it? Tell me."

 

"I can't do that. I know who can tell me where he is. I'll take care of it, Agent."

 

"You might as well tell me. If you are so sure you know what is going on, I need to know too. Besides, you've known me long enough to know I'll just shadow you until I find out."

 

"Fuck! All right but this goes no further. I'm gay, Mulder."

 

"What does that have to do with..? You've been fucking him?"

 

"Alex came into my life when I was still an agent. I was out cruising one night for company and met him. He was a freshman in college then. A beautiful boy who had been used and abused most of his life. I fell in love. I never expected it to last even when I realized he had a crush on me."

 

"Why not? I mean if he was in love with you."

 

"He was twenty, Mulder. Even then I was losing my hair and I know I'm not the most attractive man around. I just figured we'd have his college years and then he would move on. Like those men who let their wives put them through school then take off with a younger model once the career is established."

 

"So you put him through school?"

 

"He had a scholarship. I just made sure he didn't have to work so he could keep up his grades. I had planned to keep the arrangement going until he graduated. But he disappeared one night."

 

"From your attitude I take it he didn't abscond with the family silver."

 

"No, far from it. He didn't even take the clothes I had bought him. He took only what he came to me with except for the ring I had given him. He still has it. You might have noticed him wearing it."

 

"Yeah, he wasn't wearing it when he came in to meet me the first day but he was the next Monday. I take it you got back together that weekend."

 

"Yes. He came to my office that night and it was as if the years between had never happened. We spent the weekend together and, by Saturday I had gotten out of him why he had left me and who he'd left with."

 

"Don't tell me. Cancerman, right?"

 

"He left me because he had seen me with Agent Wilkes. We were undercover at a leather bar. Posing as Master and sub. He thought I was seeing someone else for my kink. He was young, naive. He didn't think he could please me since he knew nothing about BDSM. He went to a professor who has ties with Spender. Spender took him out of town that night."

 

"So what did Spender send him here to do?"

 

"Spender suspects my preferences. Alex was supposed to seduce me. Feed any kinks I had and either out me and get me fired or get them enough to blackmail me."

 

"He told you this right away?"

 

"Yes. He offered to go to Spender and say he failed. Said he would offer to become an assassin or anything else they wanted that didn't involve sex. Told me he couldn't stand the idea of sex with anyone else after being back with me."

 

"You don't think that was some clever act on his part to make you relax?"

 

"Mulder, if that were true, where is he now? Why isn't he here, charging me with harassment? If Spender were blackmailing me, would I have helped you last week?"

 

"I guess you're right. How are you going to find him?"

 

"I'll go to Spender. I'll resign if that's what it takes."

 

"He wins if you do that."

 

"Do you think I fucking care? Alex's safety is all that matters to me. I love him, Mulder. Don't you get that?"

 

Mulder stared at me for a long moment then nodded. 

 

"Don't do anything yet. Give me a chance to try and find him."

 

"I'll give you two days. I won't chance waiting longer than that. Two days then I go to Spender."

 

"Guess I'd better get started. I'll find him. And, Sir, for what it's worth, I think Alex Krycek is a very lucky man to have someone like you to love him."

 

That one sentence told me Mulder wasn't a homophobe, told me he still respected me. My throat closed with the relief I felt. I respect Mulder above most men I know and, down deep, I had been sad at the prospect of losing his respect. It's not easy being gay, especially not in the world I had chosen. I smiled my thanks, unable to voice it. 

 

Two days later, I was getting ready to leave work to head to Spender's place. The phone rang and I ignored it and headed for the elevator. I was just stepping off in the garage when my cell phone rang. 

 

"Skinner."

 

"Sir, it's me. Where are you?"

 

"I'm in the parking garage getting ready to go to see Spender."

 

"Don't do that. I'm on my way to get you. I think I know where he is. Meet me out front in five minutes."

 

I turned and almost ran. It would take me about the five minutes to reach the front entrance. He was pulling up at the curb as I got there. Yanking the door open, I got in next to him and he pulled back into traffic. 

 

"Where is he?"

 

"If the information I got was accurate, he's in an old warehouse in Virginia."

 

"Do you know how he is?"

 

"Alive is all my source said."

 

"Hurry, Mulder! Please hurry."

 

++++++++++++++++++++++++++

 

I had lost track of the time. Pain has a way of doing that to you sometimes. 

 

The physical pain was moot compared to the way my heart was breaking. They had gone to great lengths to tell me how they had cleared out my apartment. How they left clues for Mulder to find. 

 

All I could do was pray that Sergei wouldn't think I had broken my word to him. Because I was sure I'd never see him again. Spender never liked it when his people disobeyed his orders.

 

The first day had been spent trying to find out if I had come anywhere near completing my assignment. He had brought in a doctor to examine me so he knew I had been having sex with someone. His rage at finding out the sex was unprotected had brought the first beating. 

 

Spender had cursed me in between the blows. How dare I take a chance on getting AIDS? I had been instructed to only engage in safe sex even if I was with a woman. I had been told to use condoms. I was risking *his* property. 

 

They had left me for a long time in the dark after that. Time to think about Sergei. Time to steel my determination to keep him safe. With the next beating, I started to lie. I told them Skinner hadn't been interested. I said I had picked up a guy cause I was horny, he overpowered me and fucked me without a condom. 

 

I thought he had bought that until the doctor commented that I must have been having frequent sex to be as loose as I was and to have that much semen in me. He also made a crude comment estimating the size of my partner. Then I prayed that they didn't have access to Sergei's doctor or anyone who might know how well he's hung. 

 

I wasn't sure why they didn't just use drugs on me. I think Spender thought I would break and watching my pain entertained him. He was also teaching the others a lesson in what happened when he was crossed. 

 

I had often heard that love makes you strong. I used to think that was bullshit. But that is the only reason I can think of that I got through those days without giving him up. I had to protect Sergei, even if the cost was my life. 

 

I had been alone for quite some time. After the last time they worked me over, I had been tied to one of the support posts. I knew I had to be somewhere they weren't afraid of me making noise since I hadn't been gagged the entire time I had been there. 

 

I moaned low in my throat when I heard the door and footsteps. Closing my eyes, I pulled up a picture of Sergei as he had looked the last morning I had been in his bed. His eyes black with the heat of our lovemaking, sweat shining on his head in the early morning sunlight coming through the window. 

 

I tried to blot out everything but the sounds he had been making as he thrust deep inside me. Remembering how he smelled, how good he felt as he took and gave pleasure. When he spoke, I thought I had managed to go deep enough into my mind that they wouldn't be able to hurt me anymore. What other explanation could there be for me hearing him in this place where I would soon die?

 

+++++++++++++++

 

The trip to the warehouse was tense and almost silent. Mulder gave me the information he had gotten from whatever source he used. Right then I didn't care. All that mattered was getting there. We pulled up outside the warehouse, making a circuit of it to look for any vehicles first. There was no sign that anyone was there.

 

The padlock on the door was new but it seemed Mulder had come prepared. I made a note to ask him later if picking locks was now part of the curriculum at Quantico. The door made a lot of noise as we pushed it open, so we moved forward carefully. 

 

It was empty except for some pallets and packing crates. At first, I thought it was unused until Mulder pointed out the footprints leading to the other side of the stack of crates. He circled to one side as I took the other, guns drawn and ready. 

 

Had I not known him so intimately, I would not have recognized him. I've seen losing boxers who looked better after a fight. Putting my gun away, I moved quickly toward him as Mulder took up a position so he could keep an eye on the door.

 

"Alexei, can you hear me!"

 

His head rose and through the bare slits he could open his eyes, he peered at me.

 

"Is it really you?" 

 

The words lisped out through his split lips, even that effort causing them crack open and bleed. I dug through my pocket to find my handkerchief and pressed it carefully to his mouth.

 

"Don't talk anymore, boy. I'm going to get you out of here."

 

"I'm not a boy."

 

"No. I guess you aren't. Now be quiet. I'm going to take care of you. Mulder, do you have a blanket or anything like that in the car?"

 

Alexei turned his head to verify Mulder was there. My hands were busy trying to untie the ropes he was bound with. I felt a hand brush my shoulder, looked up to see Mulder holding out a knife. He turned and jogged toward the door, coming back quickly with a blanket. 

 

Once I got the ropes off, Alexei fell boneless into my arms. I felt frantically for his pulse and was relieved when I found it. With Mulder's help, I got him wrapped in the blanket and out to the car. I held him close in the back seat as Mulder followed my directions to a private clinic. 

 

+++++++++++

 

I was disoriented when I woke. I thought I had been dreaming that Sergei came for me. But here I was on clean sheets, in what looked to be a hospital room. And there he was, slumped in a chair, sawing logs. I tried to speak but no words would come out. 

 

The door opened and a nurse came to stand next to me, smiling that smile they all have.

 

"Awake? Good. Do you know your name?"

 

I tried to croak out something but no words would come.

 

"Too dry, huh? I'll get you some ice."

 

She turned, touching Sergei lightly on the arm to wake him.

 

"Mr. Skinner, he's awake. I'm going to get some ice."

 

"Thank you."

 

He got up and scrubbed at his eyes as he moved to sit on the bed. 

 

"Welcome back. You gave me quite a scare. I thought I had lost you. Don't try to talk yet. They had a tube down your throat so it must be pretty sore."

 

The nurse came back into the room with a cup of crushed ice. 

 

"Give it to him slowly. The doctor will be in soon to check him."

 

She left and he spooned some ice into my mouth. I was so parched it didn't do much so I tried to reach for the cup. That's when I saw the IV in my arm.

 

"You were in pretty bad shape, Alexei. It wasn't just the beatings but the lack of food and water. Thank god we found you when we did. The doctor said a few more hours and you would have died." 

 

He spooned in more ice and my throat began to think it might want to work again. I swallowed greedily and opened again like a baby bird. The smile on his face showing his relief. We sat in silence until he had fed me all of the ice. 

 

"How long? How did you find me?" My throat still felt like hell and my voice was very low but I wanted information.

 

"Since you disappeared? Two weeks. Mulder found you. I haven't asked how. I've taken personal leave. He knows where I am and why but no one else does."

 

"He was there with you then. I thought I was dreaming it. I would think about you when they beat me. I just kept thinking that I had to keep you safe. When you came in, I thought they had come back to kill me, so I tried to remember the last time we were together."

 

This little speech caused me to cough while Walter watched with a worried frown on his face. When it stopped, he spoke to me again.

 

"I think they just left you there to die."

 

"They told me they left clues. Did you think...?"

 

"I knew you hadn't broken your word to me. If Mulder hadn't found out where you were, I was going to Spender."

 

"Good thing you didn't. I'd rather have died than give him that information. He was so pissed when the doctor told him I'd been having unprotected sex. I thought he was going to pop a vessel. I prayed he would." 

 

"Too bad he didn't. I'm sure he would love to know who's been doing you bareback. You should have told him your lover is clean."

 

"Like I would have told him anything. He would have just wanted to know who it was so he could have him checked. No, it's better that I lied." 

 

"You're safe now. This is a private clinic run by a friend. Only Mulder and I know you are alive and here."

 

"I hurt, Walter. Will they give me something for the pain?"

 

"Of course, they will."

 

I watched as he walked to the door, asking a nurse to get the doctor for him. He came back to sit next to me, his hand brushing my hair back from my face. 

 

"We need to get you in the shower soon, your hair needs washing."

 

"That's not all. I can smell myself."

 

"Sponge baths just don't quite take care of it."

 

"Let me check him, Walter. If he's doing ok we'll take out the IV. Tomorrow once he's shown he can sit up on his own you can help him shower. There's one down the hall with handicap attachments so he can sit while you bathe him. Getting clean will probably make him feel a lot better."

 

I looked up to see a tall man about Walter's age, with salt and pepper hair and blue eyes. The lab coat was embroidered with the name Dr. Simmons. 

 

 

"Alex, this is my friend, Jesse Simmons. He's been looking after you."

 

"Nice to see you awake, Alex. I'm going to do the usual doctor type poking and prodding. I'll try to make it fast."

 

Walter moved back to the chair and waited while my temp and blood pressure were taken. The doctor checked the output in the bag, reminding me uncomfortably that I had a Foley. He inspected the bruising. The nurse came in with a hypo as he was finishing up and he added the painkiller to the IV line.

 

"You seem to be ready to get rid of the needle and tube. Want me to pull the curtain while I take out the Foley?"

 

I looked over at Walter wondering how much Dr. Simmons knew about us. 

 

"I've seen his dick a few times, Jesse. I don't think he cares if I see it with a tube in it."

 

"Might be better if I leave the curtain open. Wouldn't want you to think I was trying to play with your toys."

 

The easy grin on Walter's face told me that Jesse knew exactly what our relationship was. So I joined their teasing.

 

"He's pretty possessive, Doctor. But, I like it when he gets all butch with me."

 

They both laughed and Jesse pulled back the sheet lifting the gown to get to the tube. He was quick and impersonal but it was still uncomfortable. He took the bag over to the small bathroom. 

 

"I'll have a nurse take out the IV as soon as the bag is empty. I'll also order some food. What colour Jell-O do you want?"

 

"None!" 

 

We yelled in chorus. Jesse laughed.

 

"Ok, no Jell-O. How about pudding?"

 

"Chocolate." 

 

Walter stood and walked to the door with Jesse.

 

"Thanks again for taking care of him."

 

"Walter, I owe you and even if I didn't, I'd do whatever I could for someone you love. Now get him sitting. I'll make sure they bring the food right away."

 

We were left alone, Walter adjusted the bed and plumped the pillows. True to his word the doctor sent a nurse with food trays for us. 

 

"The doctor said to make him eat the good stuff before he gets the pudding."

 

"Don't worry he'll eat. He wants to get better, don't you, Alex?" 

 

I nodded and ate more to shut him up than out of any hunger. By the time I was finished I was even more acutely aware of my odour.

 

"I ate like you wanted, Walter. Please get a chair and take me to shower."

 

"Alex, you heard Jesse. Tomorrow when you are stronger, he said. For now, I'll give you a better sponge bath than they were able to do before." 

 

I groused and complained but at least I smelled a little better when he finished. Besides, it was a chance to feel him touching me. And his love for me was transmitted with every swipe of the washcloth. 

 

The nurse removed the IV when she came to get the dinner trays. Walter settled on top of the covers next to me in the narrow bed and held me through the night. 

 

The next morning when Walter went to use the bathroom I managed to sit up on my own. I was pleased with the look on his face. Even more pleased when he went to find Jesse. I was wearing a smile when they came back together. 

 

"See, I told you he was sitting. Did it on his own while I was in the bathroom."

 

"Ok. Let's see how everything else is this morning."

 

He checked me thoroughly. Then smiled at me.

 

"Looks like someone wants to get well. How's the pain?"

 

"Not as bad as yesterday. I'd really feel one hundred percent better if you would let Walter take me for that shower."

 

"Walter did tell me how you hate being dirty. I'll send a nurse with a wheelchair. But don't try to get in or out of it without Walter's help. Walter, I know I don't have to tell you to be careful."

 

The chair was there in a matter of a couple of minutes. He helped me into it and we followed the nurse to the bathroom. She handed Walter a small bag, showed him where the towels were and left us alone. I saw her turn the sign to say occupied before she closed the door.

 

+++++++++++

 

I spread a towel on the small bench next to the handheld showerhead. Then stripped quickly. Smiling as he whistled at me. I rolled the chair as close to the bench as possible. He eased out of it and down on the towel. He threw the gown in the direction of the hamper. 

 

I got the water going and adjusted the water to be just above body temperature, another of the advantages of knowing your lover. He moaned as I hosed him down. Tilting his head back so I could get his hair soaked without drowning him.

 

I opened the small bag the nurse had given me and found the container of shampoo. I also made a mental note that if he had to be here long I would need to go get the kind he liked. Not that I liked his hair smelling all tropical or anything.

 

He moaned again as I massaged the shampoo into his scalp. I took my time, then rinsed it thoroughly. He gave himself up to the pleasure of having me bathe him. 

 

Why is it that if feels so good to let someone else wash your hair or get your body clean? And I don't mean in a sexual way either. Although I won't pretend it never leads to that. 

 

"Never thought I'd get to enjoy you doing this to me again."

 

"I was pretty worried myself there for awhile. I did a lot of thinking the last two weeks."

 

"Any conclusions?"

 

"Jesse's a pretty fair plastic surgeon."

 

"What are you saying, Walter?"

 

"I'm saying that you can't go back to being Alex Krycek. I'm also saying that living without you is not an option."

 

"You have my undivided attention."

 

"Jesse could make some slight modifications. Just enough to convince anyone seeing you that you just resemble Alex. You could go out of the country. I need a vacation. Would be awful nice to come back from vacation with a new lover, who just happened to look a little like Alex Krycek."

 

I was kneeling on the floor washing his feet when I saw his trembling hand reach toward me. I looked up to see the unshed tears in his eyes.

 

"You love me that much? You'd live openly with me?"

 

"Yes, Alex. I love you that much."

 

Suddenly my arms were filled with a wet soapy man and we toppled over onto the cold tiles. His mouth devoured me; my cock stood up and asked to join the party. I could feel his cock getting hard against me. After all it had been two weeks. I hadn't jerked off and I was quite sure neither had he. 

 

I moaned into his mouth and wrapped a hand around our cocks. One of his hands joined mine and we stroked together. It only took a few pulls and we came explosively. His tongue traced my lips as we waited for our hearts to slow. 

 

"Come on, let's get you rinsed off and back to your room before they come looking for us."

 

"Did I remember to say thank you?"

 

"For what, Alex?"

 

"Loving me, coming to find me, offering me a new life."

 

"All those things are purely selfish on my part. But you're welcome."

 

+++++++++++

 

He helped me back up onto the bench and finished getting me cleaned up. Getting me dry and in a clean gown, he put me in the chair. I watched as he dried himself and covered up the body I love so much. Mulder was waiting for us when we got back to the room. 

 

"You certainly look better. How are you feeling?"

 

"Better than when you two found me. Thanks, Mulder. For everything."

 

"You're welcome. Walter, I've started making the arrangements you asked me to. Have you had time to talk to him about it?"

 

"We talked a little but he hasn't agreed yet."

 

"You don't think I'd turn down a chance to have a life with you, do you? I'd make the mermaid's sacrifice for you, Walter."

 

"Good, it's settled. Frohike and the guys will take care of the new ID. They need a name so they can start. Then they'll add his picture as soon as he has healed enough for a proper passport photo."

 

Two sets of eyes turned toward me waiting for my answer. 

 

"Where are we going to say I'm from? I mean you said something about leaving the country. Are we planning on saying I'm from another country?"

 

"No, I think it's better if you're American. The other country was so I could tell people I found you on vacation in some exotic location. Giving you a new homeland would involve too much paperwork to cover."

 

"I'm drawing a blank. I never had to think of what I would like to be called for the rest of my life. I always assumed I'd be Alex forever."

 

"Mulder, what do you think? Can we get away with Alexander? It'll mean less chance of either of us slipping."

 

"Hide in plain sight sort of thing. Sure, it'll be one less thing to worry about. Last name? Something with a K, maybe?"

 

"Koenig." I said grinning at Walter. Mulder looked confused. 

 

"Alex is a Star Trek fan. But only the original series. Walter Koenig played the Russian character on the show. That shows a certain symmetry, don't you think?" 

 

Mulder rolled his eyes at us in a gesture reminiscent of Scully. Then nodded.

 

"I'll get them started. What type of training have you had? We need to establish some sort of career for you. But it needs to be something you can actually do."

 

"Mulder, I don't care if I have to dig ditches. I'll be with Walter. That's all that matters."

 

"Why don't you just give him some college credits. Say he had an inheritance that he was spending the last of when we met. He can go back to school for a while. Then make a decision."

 

Mulder didn't get the message Walter was sending but I did. He was taking us back as close to the beginning of our relationship as he could. Probably a subconscious attempt to erase my time with Spender from both our minds. But I didn't care. Right then I would have agreed to anything to be with Walter.

 

I still would. 

 

We talked a while longer then Mulder left. I was so exhausted by then that Walter sat on the bed and fed me like a baby when our food was brought in. Then he snuggled next to me and we slept. 

 

+++++++++++

 

A few months later, I walked out of the hotel and down to the beach. Scanning the crowd I saw a beautiful man sitting under a huge cabana sipping a drink with an umbrella in it. I walked toward him smiling.

 

"May I share the cabana with you? I normally tan quite well but don't want to push it the first day. I don’t want to spend my vacation burnt."

 

"Please, do. It's nice to hear an American accent. My name's Alexander Koenig. You may call me Alex."

 

"Nice to meet you, Alex. I'm Walter Skinner. Please call me Walter."

 

He smiled at me then and all I wanted was to drag him back to my room and fuck him through the mattress. We hadn't seen each other since shortly after his surgery. I had threatened Jesse's balls if he took away the little lines above the nose. It was nice to see I wouldn't need to act on that threat. 

 

His eyes had more of a slant than before. But they were still my Alex's eyes. His chin now sported a dimple and I could hardly wait to dip my tongue into it. It would have to wait. The courtship must come first. A waiter approached and I ordered a drink.

 

"May I get you some refreshment, sir?"

 

"I'll have whatever he's having and bring him another one."

 

The waiter grinned and walked away. 

 

"Thank you, Walter. It's nice of you to buy me a drink. So tell me, what do you do for a living?"

 

"I work for the FBI."

 

"Sounds exciting. Out of D.C.?"

 

"Yes. What do you do?"

 

"I've been going to school and working my way through my inheritance. I wanted a last vacation before I have to find a job. Thought lazing on an island for a couple of weeks would be nice."

 

The waiter had come back with our drinks. I signed the tab then raised my glass in a toast.

 

"Well, here's to having a good time on the island."

 

"I think I'm going to have a very good time, now. Would you like to go for a swim?"

 

"Just let me finish my drink."

 

We spent the afternoon playing in the water and having drinks under the cabana. I felt freer than I had in years. As the sun began lowering in the sky and the beach started to empty, we played out one last scene for the waiter. We had decided it was important to make sure people remembered us meeting, just in case anyone ever did check up on our story. 

 

"Would you gentlemen like anything else?"

 

"I can think of lots of things I'd like, but you can't get them for me."

 

I leered at Alex at that point and winked. The waiter grinned and I knew my point had been made.

 

"Perhaps you'd like to continue our conversation over dinner, Walter? We could meet in the dining room in, say an hour? Give us both time to shower off the sunscreen and get dressed."

 

I gave him another sly look before answering.

 

"I like the way you're dressed now, but I guess it wouldn't go over too well in the dining room. Sounds like a plan."

 

We both rose and walked back to the hotel deliberately brushing each other as we walked. I don't think we left any doubt in the waiter's mind as to where we were headed. 

 

I hurried through my shower. Then dressed in a lightweight white cotton gauze shirt, a pair of white pants that hugged my ass and would allow my arousal to show. I completed the outfit with a pair of sandals. 

 

I beat him to the dining room so I ordered a drink. When he came in, my heart jumped. He was wearing a green tee tucked into tight black pants. Like me he was also in sandals. I smiled and he made his way over to me. 

 

Dinner was the longest meal of my life. He played it up for all he was worth. By the time we got up to leave, I don't think there was anyone left in the room with doubts as to whose bed I would be in that night. 

 

+++++++++++++

 

Walter followed me down the hall to my room. I had teased him relentlessly during dinner. I know his hard-on was obvious to everyone we passed on the way out. I also knew I would get the hard fuck I wanted once we were in the room. The door was barely closed and he was on me.

 

"You little brat. I ought to whip your butt for teasing me like that."

 

"Wouldn't you rather fuck it?"

 

"Oh, you're gonna get fucked. You'll be bowlegged tomorrow."

 

"Oh, I just love a forceful man."

 

That was the last word for quite some time. He literally threw me onto the bed. The shirt had been new but when he got through, it would never be worn again. Not that I cared. I struggled to unbutton his shirt as he sucked my nipples. 

 

If felt so good to be with him again. Somehow we got undressed. He lubed me and he pulled my legs up high on his hips. We seemed to be on the same wavelength. He plunged into me, claiming me as his again. I moaned around the tongue he was sticking down my throat as he pumped into me over and over again. 

 

It didn't last long, we had been apart too long. We came with a howl that brought a hotel employee to the door a short time later. Walter opened the door stark naked as I lounged on the bed equally naked. 

 

 

"Sir, sorry to disturb you. A guest thought someone was hurt." 

 

The poor man was red faced as he stuttered at the big naked man standing in the doorway. I smiled at the man trying to look anywhere but at Walter's naked body. He wasn't succeeding very well. If I hadn't been secure in Walter's love for me, I might have been jealous. But I just grinned as I watched Walter cement the act.

 

"We're fine. I'm sorry we disturbed another guest. We'll try to keep it down."

 

"Thank you, sir. Have a good evening."

 

Walter closed the door and launched himself back onto the bed. 

 

"You need to learn to be less noisy." Walter informed me as he bent to bite my nipple. 

 

"Me? I don't bellow like a bull." I tried for outrage but that's hard to do when your lover is sucking on *any* part of your body.

 

"Bull? I'll show you a bull." As he rolled me over and covered me with his body I could feel him starting to grow again. 

 

"Yeah, you are sort of hung like one. Come on, I'll be the cowboy. I'm sure riding *my* bull will make me as bowlegged as a Texan."

 

 

 

Epilogue: One year later

 

 

"Walter!"

 

"In the office."

 

I ran down the hall to the open doorway. He smiled as he waited for me to tell him how it went.

 

"I got the job. I start in two weeks."

 

"Why two weeks?"

 

"Because I already bought tickets for us to spend our anniversary on the island where we fell in love."

 

He smiled at my answer. After a year, we no longer alluded to the life Alex Krycek had lived. We had decided it was better that way. Just in case they bugged our house. All the things from that time were still in the basement. We often made love down there and remembered but out loud we only talked of our life since that first day on the island. 

 

"Got plenty of sunscreen? I understand the beach is nude now and I don't want my toys damaged." 

 

His grin was so lecherous it went straight to my cock. His grin grew wider as his eyes dropped to the evidence of my desire for him. I grinned right back at him as I fired my salvo.

 

"Yeah, well, I don't want to be up all night listening to you moan that your cheeks are burnt either. All that sunscreen application might make it *hard* to leave the room. I mean we can't be seen on the beach with erections."

 

"We only have to worry about yours."

 

"Now, how do you figure that?"

 

"I'll stick close behind you. That way I won't need sunscreen on my dick and no one will see it's hard."

 

The mental image of the two of us trying to walk on the beach with his dick in my ass was the final straw. I launched myself at him. The chair toppled, we hit the floor and he wrapped his arms around me. 

 

"You are in so much trouble, Mister. Good thing I asked for a bungalow when I made the reservations, cause I think we'll both come home bowlegged this year."

 

"Oh, I hope so, Alex. I can't think of any nicer way to end a vacation."

 

The end


	2. So Precious a Coin

I opened the door and stepped into the apartment. It was Friday and I was looking forward to the long weekend with my schoolboy. Alex was curled up in the armchair, a small fire in the hearth and a book on his lap. He looked up at me and smiled. 

 

"You're early."

 

"That a problem?"

 

"Never. I was just finishing my lit assignment."

 

"Go ahead. I'll order some dinner. It was a bitch of a day, so all I want is food, a shower and you in that order."

 

I placed the order with our favorite Chinese place down the block and told them I'd pay extra for it to be delivered. I smiled as his nose crinkled with his smile. Hanging up the phone, I sat on the sofa near him.

 

"Must be good to make you smile that way."

 

"It is. Reminds me of us."

 

"Then read it to me."

 

I dropped my head back and closed my eyes waiting for his voice to sooth some of my stress away.

 

"It's poetry, Sergei, here goes:

 

 

_The Beautiful Rider by Arja Tiainen_

_With me you'd have the time of your life, nobody's ever complained, they all_

_want it all over again, why don't you, just once?_

_You could screw me whatever way you please."_

 

 

My eyes opened and my head rose. He was blushing slightly as he said the words out loud. I had learned early on that he could say anything in character, but once we were living together, the only time the language of his former trade came out was when we made love. In normal conversation he very seldom cursed. 

 

 

_"I'd pretend to be a piece of meat in a skewer, like a worm on a hook,_

_like a cake in a mould, elastic, wonderful, quiet or wild, those tricks._

_Wonder why you're not interested?"_

 

 

Oh, I was interested, you'd better believe I was. The idea of skewering him was always attractive. 

 

 

_"I'd be a Jolly Mattress That Sings."_

 

 

I chuckled at that image, especially since he often made music for me.

 

 

_"Or: a rambler, creeping, insatiable._

_A boat in the surge. A beautiful Rider."_

 

 

*My* beautiful, insatiable Rider.

 

 

_"An eel hung in the ceiling, naked, lovely._

_A wide aperture, a rolling Night of Joy."_

 

 

His eel was definitely lovely when it was naked, and he'd given me many nights of joy in the time we'd been lovers.

 

_"A sighing tree, a two-tongued mouth, eyes, I'd eat you up at once_

_I'd tear you apart, I'd claw you all bloody, I'd leave monstrous marks_

_or wouldn't._

_Why won't you fuck me?"_

 

 

The word fuck was almost whispered, then I was on my knees next to his chair. The book dropped to the floor as I pulled him to me. We re-enacted the two-tongued mouth portion of that until the knock came at the door. 

 

"You'll have to wait to be fucked until after dinner. I missed lunch."

 

He groaned as I rose to go pay for dinner. He carefully did not look at the delivery boy and stayed turned away from us. I pretended I didn't notice when the guy ogled my erection. We ate quickly, then I hauled him into the bathroom for a shower. 

 

He tried to get playful but I didn't allow that. I wanted him spread all over that big bed. I wanted to do the things in that poem. Once we were finished, I dried off hurriedly. 

 

I pushed him down on the bed, watched as he scooted back, and knee walked between his legs. Kneeling there, I stroked his cock to a full erection. 

 

"This is quite a lovely eel. I think I'm still hungry."

 

"Sergei…" his whine only encouraged me. 

 

Bending, I gripped him with one hand as I used my tongue to guide his foreskin into my mouth. I sucked gently as he squirmed, pulling the skin up to cover the glans, before teasing him by slipping underneath it. 

 

"Please…Sergei…need…"

 

I'd always loved seeing how quickly I could make him revert to single words. I spent several long minutes working on just the head. His whines escalated to a register that I felt sure were causing dogs to howl somewhere. 

 

When his legs wrapped around my head like a vise, I deep throated him. He immediately jerked; his come shooting down my throat. As I swallowed the last spurt, his legs went limp and I slipped up to lie next to him holding him as he came down.

 

Once he was breathing normally again, he pushed me onto my back. I watched mesmerized as he got himself slick for me. Not taking my eyes off him, I propped myself up with the pillows behind my back. The condom was rolled on and he straddled me. 

 

"Ready to skewer me, Sergei?"

 

"As ready as you are to ride."

 

I held my cock for him as he got into position, then gasped as he dropped hard onto me. Slipping my hand up behind his head, I pulled him to me for a kiss. When it ended he started to move slowly on me, pulling up high and dropping fast. 

 

I tweaked his nipples as he pleasured me. Nothing else has ever compared to how it feels having him ride me that way. When his dick started to rise again, I stroked him. I reared up into him as I neared my climax. 

 

"That feels like surging, Sergei."

 

"Shut up and mark me."

 

He bent, to bite into my shoulder. My fist contracted around his dick, my cock tried to screw right through him and I yelled his name as I shot. His teeth tightened a little more and I felt the skin give way. He licked the spot before leaning back. 

 

Pushing my nerveless hand away, he jerked his cock. Three hard pulls and he was shooting on my chest. We panted into each other's mouths and I could taste my blood. His head dropped to my shoulder and I caressed him.

 

_"Stars in the same constellation."_

 

"What?" his voice sounded sleepy and I resigned myself to napping in the position we were in.

 

"It's from another of her poems."

 

"'kay."

 

I drifted to sleep holding him securely to me.

 

Fin.


End file.
